Blogging without flogging and remembering to breathe

p1013873Hi! I’ve been trying to get to this blog for a week, but I’ve been too busy living large, and I refuse to make this my ball and chain. I was delighted, in fact, to find there is a movement called Blogging Without Obligation, or, as I like to think of it, Blogging Without Flogging. I’m still struggling with why am I doing this anyway? Does anyone care? And I’ve come to the conclusion it doesn’t matter who reads this or how many people read this; it’s a way to have a voice and it’s a way to connect and to create, and if it's just for me and I'm shouting into the wind, so be it. I'm willing to let it evolve and see what comes... So, about living… since Chloe has been out of school for two weeks now, we have had quite a fun-filled vacation so far. A visit from Diana and Elena, which was a welcome reprieve from the reality of needing to generate more income and find a new home come September, kept us going for a full week. We made a quick trip to Beaufort, second oldest town in North Carolina, and rife with ship and pirate lore.

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From there we took a safari tour of Shackleford Island, where a herd of 120 wild horses roam (descendents of horses who swam to shore 500 years ago from Spanish galleons who dumped them overboard to lighten their load or else swam to shore from sinking ships). After hiking the 9-mile long, uninhabited island and getting to view these beautiful creatures up close, including two newborns, we spent the rest of the day picking up seashells and swimming in the warm water of the Atlantic Ocean on one side and the sound on the other. And then home again, home again, jiggety jig.

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We ushered in summer on the Solstice by taking a  3-hour canoe trip down the Haw River, not far from our home. It was a little more arduous than we girls (Diana and Elena in one canoe and Martha—my brother-in-law’s adorable girlfriend—and me in another) had bargained for, but Rob loved spending his Father’s Day canoeing his daughter down a lazy river. Bill, my brother-in-law, paddling with Martha’s son, Talis. and Rob, paddling with Chloe, made it look easy (damn their early days spent on all sorts of boats).

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The visit with Diana and Elena ended too quickly, and no sooner was I back into reality than panic threatened to set in: We only have two months before Matt and Andrea come back from Greece to reclaim their house and for us to find a new home (it’s so important for me to find one I love) as we continue to build our new life here. I am having to work on TRUST. I am having to remember to EMBRACE THE CHAOS, which is the antidote to panicking. I am waiting for my professional license to arrive and meanwhile I am working on BEING more in the moment, living with the uncertainty, and doing what I can, when I can. Breathe, I remind myself, just breathe.

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